How To Deal With Your Child’s Separation Anxiety
- by WONDERMOM
- Jan. 10, 2023
Prior to the age of six, young children are not completely formed as independent people. They are very reliant on others for care, and maintaining intimate relationships is one of their brain’s primary preoccupations. In the 1950s, a British psychologist called John Bowlby created the word attachment and said that a child’s mental health is dependent on a warm, pleasurable, and consistent connection with a parent. Children are not designed to appreciate separation, as dictated by nature.
Faced with separation, young toddlers may exhibit irritation, tantrums, resistance, and antagonism. During the night, a child’s accumulated anxiety from the day is triggered by the point of separation that sleep symbolizes.
From the viewpoint of a parent, it might be helpful to keep in mind that if our children did not want us near, we would be unable to care for them. Attachment is the superglue that holds us together and gives us a feeling of home, warmth, and belonging. Attachment serves as the entryway for missing and separation anxiety.
Additionally, toddlers and preschoolers have shyness tendencies that make them hesitant to accept care from others. This is the outcome of good brain development by the age of six months, when a kid identifies a main caregiver. At this age, the youngster will begin to exhibit stranger resistance and have a definite preference for whoever they want to be close to. The tendency to avoid strangers is nature’s method of ensuring that animals follow the humans responsible for their care.
Take the time to capture their attention and interact with them in depth. Relationships defined by happiness, enjoyment, and warmth tend to provide the greatest nourishment for their relationship requirements. A stronger relationship with a kid will enable him or her to develop as an independent individual and to face greater separation.
It is crucial not to fight against a child’s conduct, such as seeking their parent or experiencing nighttime worries; these are only symptoms of an underlying separation issue. If means of punishment, such as time-outs or penalties, that worsen the separation are utilized, the child’s emotions will be heightened and their conduct will be more difficult to control.
We cannot fault young children for choosing their parents, but it is reassuring to know they may also form relationships with others. Given their innate shyness, it is crucial that we expose them to the persons who will provide care for them.
We cannot leave these linkages to chance; instead, we must demonstrate that we endorse the connection. This may include introducing them cordially, highlighting commonalities and shared interests, and indicating that you like and trust this individual. A kid will follow people to whom they are devoted, and if you display your affection for the caregiver, they will follow suit given time and patience.
Tears are a component of the brain’s inner workings that release emotional energy when the brain is stimulated. Tears are not a problem; they are the solution when the void is overwhelming. Important is ensuring that a youngster has someone with whom he or she feels comfortable expressing their distress, sobbing, or seeking solace. When kids can rely on someone for emotional support, they will develop trust in their caregiver and be better able to adjust to the separation from their parents.